Hoochie? or My Baby's Mama?

Are you a hoochie mama? You know, the scourge of the dating world, hated by men and women alike because of the way they treat guys, and because guys let themselves be treated that way. Do you think you might be a hoochie mama, but are afraid to ask? Answer these questions truthfully and find out. Each question is worth 1 point. If you score higher than a 15, YOU ARE A hoochie!

1) Have you ever worn a shirt with glittery printing on it?

2) Do you own a shirt barely big enough to fit a Chihuahua?

3) Do you frequent hip-hop clubs?

4) Do you ever bring just enough money for the cover, yet are able to drink all night long?

5) When dancing do your tits and ass get more exercise than the rest of your body?

6) Do you think that the "ass grind" is a legitimate contemporary urban dance?

7) Do you own at least one bottle of body glitter?

8) Do you find thong bikini's too "frumpy"?

9) Do you need strobe lights and smoke machines to "feel normal"?

10) Have you ever kissed another girl on the dance floor just to get a reaction from the guys?

11) Have you ever lied to a boy to get a free drink? (e.g. "no, I don't have a boyfriend")

12) Did you ever own a Salt and Peppa album?

13) Were you excited about starting your new job at Hooter's because you really wanted one of those t-shirts?

14) Is Christina Aguillera your female role model?

15) Have you ever spent time searching for the perfect person to buy you drinks?

16) Do you have "male groupies"?

17) Have you ever belittled a friend for their ugly date, but gave her props when you found out it drove her ex-boyfriend nuts?

18) Have you ever worn platform shoes high enough they'd allow Gary Coleman to play for the NBA?

19) Do your best guy friends warn other guys about you?

20) Do you know all the words to "Baby Got Back"?

21) Have you ever flirted with the DJ just so he will be sure to play "your song"?

22) Has anyone (even your parents) ever seen you without makeup on (since you turned 13)?

23) Do you own a "belly chain"?

24) Do you have blonde hair (that's not real)?

25) Do glittering, glowing, things amuse you endlessly?

26) Is your life's ambition to be a manager at the Wet Seal (so you won't have to buy any new "work clothes")?

27) Have you ever had 2 guys fight over who gets to buy you a drink?

28) At the age of 30, you still buy your clothes at Contepo because it makes you feel young?

29) Have you ever worn club clothes to family Christmas and had no 2nd thoughts?

30) Was getting your belly button pierced your way of asserting yourself?

31) Do any of the CD's in your collection not contain glass rattling bass?

32) Do you wear one set of clothes when you leave the house, and the same set of clothes coming home the next day?

33) Has your mother ever mistaken your clothes in the laundry for lingerie?

34) Do your shirts need to be washed separate from everything else, so as not to get glitter on your black flare pants?